If they’re not impressed by your sigil. They’re most likely superficial.
*Sigil courtesy of Chaos Tarot
– Replace your physical presence with a sigil
Trust me, no one needs to see your physical form. If they aren’t fully aroused by the intentions of this occult symbol, they aren’t worth your time.
– Have a tarot date
Invite them out to a public coffee shop, produce your favorite tarot deck, and read their cards. Stack the deck and make sure The Lover is prominently displayed. Make eye contact and wiggle your eyebrows when discussing this.
– Remind people that you’re a practitioner.
Whatever your practice happens to be, inform people of it. Everyone is absolutely fascinated by the amount of knowledge you possess about chaos magick. It’s definitely your most attractive trait.
– Yes, you totally should tell them about the time you did blood magick.
Remember this phrase: “If they are SCARED, then they are SHEEP.”
– Use fun “Would You Rather” scenarios
“Would you rather fellate Anton Lavey or have to pet-sit for him?”
– Be Intimidating
Everyone loves an intentionally intimidating person. There’s something comforting about a semi-stranger who is grimacing at you spookily while chewing on chicken wing bones that is deeply arousing.
– BE MORE INTIMIDATING
Be sure to communicate to them that shortly prior to your date you did a spell wherein you burned cat fur, stinging nettle, and rose hips with the intention of being entered by them that evening. If you smell like burned hair, it will help.
– Communication is key
It’s important to communicate your intentions in a dating scenario. Make sure they know whether this is a hookup or more of a “I want to own a cottage in the woods with you and we can share a stump altar” situation.
– Rituals make for fun dates!
“Hey babe, after we open this fifth seal, you’re gonna be the sixth one, 😉”
– A little anointing goes a long way.
It’s just as fragrant as it is sacred. Douse yourself in a unique blend of Florida water and Abramelin oil constantly. It’s also crucial to be seen doing this – all metaphysical practices are best performed in front of reluctant onlookers. I mean, what’s the point otherwise?